(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
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