Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Randomize
