Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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