This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
