i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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