It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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