can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
