We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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