I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
