You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
