On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
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