just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize