You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
