her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Randomize
