i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
