i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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