i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Randomize
