I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
