belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
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