My boss' voice literally gives me gas
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
