The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
