im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
