Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
