I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
