Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
