wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
