the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
