Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
