yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
