I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
