I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i will never coherently bang her
Girls should come with a carfax report
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
