Grow some girl-balls and come out already
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
