I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
We need a shit load of segways right now
I have aggressive nipples.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
