I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
