Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
only you would photoshop your dick
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
