i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
