So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
