I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
