If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Randomize
