fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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