is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
