so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
