You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
