I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
