they need to just BURY HIM!
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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