we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
