even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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