i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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