FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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