You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
